fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
