My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
The air was thick with penises
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
