whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
