There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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