Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
