Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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