Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
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