Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
