Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
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