Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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