My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
