How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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