Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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