is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
