Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize
