I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
