What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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