Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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