His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
