WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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