i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
where does the pee come out of this thing
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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