bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
