Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
