Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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