I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
We left the knife in your bed.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
