Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
