At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
