I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
