I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
