Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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