Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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