wrigley field is MILF paradise
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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