Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
