No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
They took my balls.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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