addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize