what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize