I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
