we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
