I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
