i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
