I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
