i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
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