John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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