My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
