there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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