Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize