angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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