Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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