You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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