You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize